As some of you know this past week has been awful for my family, and so when I can I am trying to grab those moments of beauty that are always around us. A bird singing, a flower opening, a bee buzzing, a kind word, a child giggling or as I saw a few minutes ago a sunrise.

The reason it has been so awful is that my lovely husband died suddenly and unexpectedly.

MrB was (and will always be in our hearts and memories) a fabulous dad, a loving grandfather, a great brother, uncle and son in law, a wonderful and kind friend and of course book person extraordinaire. He was truly amazing, and so kind and gentle. He also had a passion for bad puns!

Everyone who ever met him is going miss him.

111 thoughts

  1. Becky you are a tremendous brave person. It was so good to see and talk to you yesterday. You know my heart and love is going your way. Much love. Tie another knot and hold on tight. Talk to you later my friend. ❤ ❤

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    1. Thank you so so much Cee. I am amazed at myself during the few hours when I function at a high level, think it is his love and the love of all his friends and my friends that it giving me this strength. So thank you so so much for all of your support. It is helping so much. Yesterday was tough as you can imagine, but today feels a little bit brighter this morning. So taking each hour, each day as it comes and also going with the flow.

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  2. Oh I am so sorry to read this Becky, how awful for you and your family. Sudden loss can be especially devastating for everyone left behind. I’ll be thinking of you over the coming weeks, hoping you can find more of those moments to hang on to while you adjust as best you can to what has happened.

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  3. Oh Becky, this is miserable for you and your family. I am so sorry. I hope the happy memories and good times can warm your hearts. You’ll always miss him; I send you hugs from California.

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  4. Oh my goodness, Becky, I’m shocked and saddened to read this. I’ve been on a short break but I needed to send my condolences to you and your family. As I attend Palm Sunday services today I will be sure to ask for prayer for you and your family. Hugs my friend and prayers for peace.

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  6. Oh my dear Becky! That is beyond awful and I am so sorry to hear. Your post is a lovely and loving tribute, but my words are inadequate. My deepest condolences to all who knew and loved him. May his memory be a blessing.

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  7. I am so very sorry to read this. I am probably not alone in the blogging community in thinking of you as such a pillar of strength with the many things you do and are the binding that holds many of us together. May you draw upon that strength and know that I and so many are sending you thoughts and condolences.

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    1. aww thanks Tom. I am. The mornings are my time, and I am using it connect with nature, friends and silence. Whatever I need each morning, and it is helping as are everyone’s kind words and support. So thank you

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  11. Beautifully written, Becky. I am so pleased to see your strength is keeping you going. Mr B has clearly left you with so much love and joy that will see you through these difficult times. Take care xx

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    1. Thank you Debbie. You are right it is definitely his love and joy that is helping me so very much, as is this incredible support and love that is arriving digitally and in the post. All helps so much.

      The post mortem has finally happened, and so I am hoping in the next few days I will be able to register. There are delays in the registration service as well as the coroners office, so everything taking a little bit longer than it should. Doesn’t help but it is what it is. Do hope you had a lovely day yesterday with Sue xx

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  14. I am so sorry Becky after learning of your husband’s demise….. May it rain strength and will power upon you and your family in these delicate moments. May the bird’s song bless you and fill your heart with stability. Hope the dark and gloom gets coloured by the approaching spring…

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  15. You know how I feel, am glad you are doing OK. It is hard to keep going but going you must. It must have been difficult to write this post. I am glad you did as a moment of release. When you sit down among the books think of the good times as I am sure you will. Give the girls a hug from me and take a few for yourself when needed 🤗🤗🤗 xx

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    1. Thanks Brian, your love and support is really helping. You will laugh though on books – more are still arriving in house thanks to orders he placed and auctions he attended online recently. So we’re going to be surrounded by thousands of books for months if not years!!

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      1. Yes I did have a laugh Becky 🙂 I can just imagine the look on your face when you come home to a box on the doorstep in the next few weeks. I hope it makes you
        1 Smile
        2 Sigh
        3 Laugh
        4 Have happy memories
        or 5 all of the above xx

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  19. Oh no that’s terrible Becky, I am at a loss for words and don’t really know you but feel like I do. I hope you have lots of support and kindness surrounding you ♥️

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    1. Thanks Anabel. It is helping so much knowing everyone is thinking of me during this time.

      The post mortem has finally taken place, hoping to get results today so I can start the process of registration. The girls are also both with me, and last night the three of us had a quiet evening together which was really nice. He would have been so happy to see us supporting each other

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  21. Sweetheart, there are no words! My heart hurts every time I think of the pair of you. Sudden loss is the worst to experience. Part of you thinks it can’t be real, you must have imagined it. One foot in front of the other is all you can do, Becky, and draw that lovely family around you. So many moments you have to look back on, and very few regrets, I think. Sending warmest love from one of his favourite places.

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    1. Thank you so much Jo, that helps so much. The feet are moving most days, the strength of his love and the support of you and others is helping that happen. So huge thanks

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  22. Oh Becky, my heart goes out to you and your family. “Awful” is certainly an understatement. Grab hold of those moments like a sunrise and I hope they keep giving you strength for the days and weeks ahead. Kia kaha, Becky.

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    1. I didn’t dare use the actual words I have been using to describe the past week! Thank you so much for your kind words and support, it really helps

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      2. Not quite got there yet, as so far the words suffice!! But glad you suggested it as think it might be a good one next. Thanks again for the support

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